Tardy

Um, it's probably a bit surprising, but the reason I vanished before Christmas was because my family and I went on a holiday to a beach city. Memorable experiences include seeing a girl/boy (I THINK it was a boy, but goddamn, he had less meat on his bones than Sandman/Morpheus) whom I refer to as "No-Eye Guy" (it's rhymes!) because he had such a long fringe that it made him look as if he had no eyes. When you did glimpse them, they were bleary or as pitiless as the eyes of a Ganymede Lobster. Weird.

We also went to the cinema, but didn't see anything because Mum wanted to watch Pride and Prejudice, which wasn't showing. I didn't want to watch that movie. I don't go to the cinema for Jane Austen, and I liked that BBC series better anyway. I wanted to watch Corpse Bride, but it was on at some insane time, and only twice in a day. Bah.

We also watched lots of Nickelodeon.

...

Um.

It's a funny thing. In the old old OLD days they had lots of different ways to say "You're watching Nick!"
Now they just get Spongebob to say it. Over and over. In fact, Spongebob was practically the only thing they showed. Even the old Birthday Machine, which had claymation rats, was given over to Spongebob. Absolutely every 'we're so great, here's why' session in which they talked about the shows they had ended up talking about Spongebob. I am convinced that Plankton is not the real evil genius here.

But some of the shows weren't so bad. A lot of them were awful, and some of them were good. 'The Boy' was awful. 'Jimmy Neutron' will always be awful. 'Mew Mew Power' was... mind-crushingly girly. 'Yu-Gi-Oh!' is awful, but in a hilarious way.
'Avatar' is good, except Nick decided that children are stupid and need to have things repeated, often. Thus they showed the same episode two days in a row. No explanation. Graaaagh. 'Fairly Odd Parents' somehow manages to annoy the snot out of me and entertain me at the same time. Huh. 'Danny Phantom' was okay. It looks like it'd actually be kind of fun to watch, except Nick gave up its time slot for a two-hour Jimmy Neutron session.

I don't need to talk about 'Invader Zim.' Suffice to say that I think canceling it was justified, but Nick still treated it horribly. Jerks.

The funny thing about this 'beach' holiday is that despite having both togs and a towel, we never swam in the pool or at the beach. I hate beach swimming. I can't swim, and I've gotten dumped so many times it's not funny. Actually, it was NEVER funny...clawing my way towards air with water buffering me on all sides, feeling like I'm trying to jump through molasses. Jesus. It's the stuff of nightmares. And I hate sand. And I burn easily. I like climbing on rocks, though, and walking at sunset.

Mostly all we did was hang around in the hotel and eat Thai food. Nice holiday, really. Except when they cut off the power for no reason.